There is a Heinlein story, the exact name of which I forget (MLG will know), in which the protagonist tracks incidents that he feels are indicators of the onset of “The Crazy Years.”  That story quite naturally resulted in the protagonist holed up in the mountains while nukes fell on the cities below.

We are, my friends, slap-ass in the middle of The Crazy Years Redux, if you haven’t already figured that out for yourself.  I’m not just talking about our new socialist overlords government – and the near-constant subversion of our Constitution – but smaller things, daily occurrences that chip away at the average human’s ability to be a self-reliant, logical, reasoning entity.

Here’s a big old stinking example.  January 13 a Texas high school basketball team beat another team by the whopping score of 100-0.  No big deal, right?  The winning team was clearly a great deal more talented than the losing team, and just outplayed them.  Some might whinge that was “running the score up,” but what is the winning team to do, just stop trying?  What kind of lesson is that for those girls?  Or for the losing team…who have a total of EIGHT girls on the varsity team, with only 20 total in the entire school…they never quit, kept playing, kept TRYING through the entire game.

A few days later it was reported the winning team wanted to forfeit the win to the losing school, they felt bad about the blowout…AFTER the fact, mind you, when they’d had the opportunity to be scorned by the bleeding hearts among the teaching staff/parents.  (That last bit is pure conjecture on my part, but I’m probably right, you know.)

Then winning team’s school administrators then posted a public slam of everyone involved:

On its Web site last week, Covenant, a private Christian school, posted a statement regretting the outcome of its Jan. 13 shutout win over Dallas Academy. “It is shameful and an embarrassment that this happened. This clearly does not reflect a Christlike and honorable approach to competition,” said the statement, signed by Queal and board chair Todd Doshier.

And now the coach has been fired for calling bullshit:

The coach of a Texas high school basketball team that beat another team 100-0 was fired Sunday, the same day he sent an e-mail to a newspaper saying he will not apologize “for a wide-margin victory when my girls played with honor and integrity.”

Hopefully everyone involved – save the reactionary pussies that blew it all out of proportion – will take the following lessons from this ludicrous non-incident:

• It’s ok to win.
• It’s ok to lose.
• School administrators, with few exceptions, fail upwards.
• Sometimes a teacher will take a hit for you.  Honor them by remembering the fucking lesson.

This is the kind of thing you just love to read on a lazy Sunday afternoon: young adults – the future of our country, thank you – exhibiting all the backbone and neural complexity of laboratory-grade protoplasm.

Campus police at East Carolina University said they made one arrest and used pepper spray on some students as officers tried to control a huge snowball fight on campus.

Pepper spray??   To break up a SNOWBALL FIGHT???

Well it was a Really Mean snowball fight:

“It all started in good nature, but then people were throwing them as hard as they could at each other. They were everywhere,” said junior Brandon Davis, noting he got hit in the head.

He said a girl was knocked to the ground after being hit in the face with a snowball thrown from 10 feet away, while another student cried after getting hit in the eye.

Now, living as I do in Florida, it has indeed been some time since I’ve been involved in a snowball fight, but unless you’re packing snow around a big fucking rock, hitting someone with a snowball generally results in nothing more than a bit of a sting.  Certainly not tear-worthy.  Unless you’re five.

So the students are pussies, and the cops…the cops are pussies, too.

Police said an officer used pepper spray on a group of students that rushed officers trying to make an arrest. Authorities estimate between 200 and 250 people were involved, but no serious injuries were reported.

Pepper spray, on a bunch of squishy student types?  I mean, come ON.  Sidestep, elbow to the solar plexus, DOWN. 

Matt Lunchick, a junior, said he saw an officer tackle and arrest a student after the officer was hit with a snowball in the back.

SIGH.  This is the sort of blown-out-of-porportion bullshit that causes our retarded Congresscritters to feel they have to draft legislation to Pruhteck the Peeples.  We can’t have them causing each other owies, now can we?

We’re going to need a bigger cheese grater.

Via Hot Air…anyone who is, or has EVER been, a member of PETA is cordially invited to step into oncoming traffic.

When you think cute, playful, and snuggly in animals, the logical choice of pet is … trout?  That’s what PETA thinks, anyway, in its new campaign to propagandize children into avoiding meat.  They now want to call fish “sea kittens”, because then no one would ever think of eating a kitten — right?

Well, there’s only one way to respond to that:

As a dedicated purveyor of Snark, this article blog post at TechCrunch was, naturally, of interest to me.   

Canadian model Liskula Cohen has sued Google for a number of snarky remarks that were made by a blogger using the company’s Blogger service. The NY Daily News reports that the former Vogue cover girl has been called ’skanky’ and ‘an old hag’ by an anonymous blogger on a website called Skanks in NYC (could be deemed NSFW).

On the face of it, this is just another aging blonde’s desperate bid for contiued any relevancy, but let’s look a bit closer at the wording of the TechCrunch writer’s commentary:

While some people are quick to dismiss that the model would have a case, and that she’s just looking for attention, I’m not so sure. It’s nearly impossible to identify bloggers who don’t reveal their real name without the help of the companies that maintain publishing platforms, and a line has to be drawn somewhere regarding what people can say anonymously just because they’re using the internet to say it.

Emphasis, as they say, mine.

So,  just who is going to draw that line, and on what criteria is the line to be drawn?

This, Ms. Blogger, is what’s known as The Slippery Slope.  There are already perfectly adequate libel and slander laws in place, properly placing the burden of proof on the plaintiff, and basically only protecting their ability to earn a living – not to seek revenge for their hurt feewings.  

So what then do you propose be done to stop the meanies from being mean?  Whinge at them a little bit louder?  Spank them on their widdle bottoms?  Have the FBI invade their homes and cut their intarwebz connections?  

See where I’m going with this, dear?  Gods, you people are exhausting.

The comment section, featuring some of the finest deadest minds on the internet today 45 minutes ago are even better.

It _is_ illegal to say mean things about someone or some company.

According to federal laws, you are not allow to libel, slander, demean, lie, distribute graphical images, etc. If caught, you will be imprisoned.

I’ll just let you, my 96 loyal readers, chew on that one for a bit.  Mmm, tasty!

Here’s another future brain surgeon toe-picker:

How come all the comments are about her…

The pussy that owns that blog should step forward. It takes a real douche to take the time and effort to do this to someone. Get a life

Google should expose whoever did it

Trust me when I tell you, sweetums, that anonymous blogging is truly liberating.  Here’s your sign:

I wonder if there was ever a time in my life when reading the news did NOT make me angry.  If there is, I sure can’t recall it…I suppose it’s as they say:  if you’re not pissed off, then you’re not paying attention.  

Reading the news this morning has my blood pressure up, and that little vein in my temple throbbing, so in sheer self defense, I hereby create Kick in the Ass Day.  It seems like the kind of thing you might have once a year, but nooooo, I think we need to have it once a week instead, seeing as how there are So Very Many people who are So Very Deserving of a kick in the ass.  Ergo, every Wednesday hereforth is Kick in the Ass Day.  Here, I’ll start:

1. French President Nicolas Sarkozy, a man I would not trust to find his own dick without a GPS fix:  ”…went so far as to say, revoltingly, that Israel had hurt the cause of peace in the Mideast by sending ground troops into Gaza.”
2. Egyptian President Mubarak, a man who knows neither jack nor shit about ‘humanitarianism:’  ”…called the humanitarian crisis in Gaza “intolerable,” and demanded an immediate ceasefire and the opening of a humanitarian corridor into Gaza.  Mr. Mubarak blamed the deteriorating situation in Gaza on Israel’s military operations and said it is leading to an increase in tensions and instability in the Mideast.”
3. Annie Lennox, singer and drooling moron:  ”A few days after Christmas I came downstairs, put the television on and saw smoke pyres emanating from buildings and it shook me to the core. I was thinking, as a mother and as a human being, how was this going to be a solution to peace? It’s a question of human rights, human values that goes beyond Jewish, Muslim, nothing to do with any of that. There has to be a place ultimately where people come to the table”. “

With the exception of the dancing monkey there in the #3 slot, these people, one can assume, are reasonably intelligent to rise to the top leadership position in their respective countries – or at least cunning as fuck – so how does one explain their apparent position that it’s hunky dory for the terrorists to lob over 3000 missiles (in 2008) at Israeli civilians, but it’s not so peachy keen for the IDF to wade in and kick some fucking ass to make it stop?   That’s not logic, that’s self-fucking-delusion.  

Congratulations to all the honorees in the First Weekly Kick in the Ass Day.  You may download the following image and display it proudly on your MySpace page, Facebook profile, and/or personal scrapbook.

And let that be a lesson to you.

No, not that kind.  Pervs.

Should I be fortunate enough in the future to resume attendance of musical performances, operas, and the like (ie. post-children), I hereby vow to put boot (or stylish-yet-comfortable flats) to ass the very first time someone purportedly in existence to entertain me decides to interrupt said entertainment in order to interject their un-asked-for, un-wanted, and un-intelligent political opinion into the proceedings.  

In other words, shut the fuck up and amuse me, as you’ve been paid to do.

Dear New York Times:  Consider these facts, if you will.  A) You suck.  B) You suck so hard you have to sell ads on your previously “pristine” front page.  C) You suck so very, VERY hard, that you decide a funereal editorial on the entire situation is a) interesting to your readership, b) possessing of any shred of dignity whatsoever, and c) at all news.

Let me spell it out for you, I’ll even use small(ish) words:

WE ARE TIRED OF YOUR PARTISAN HACKERY.  DIE NOW PLEASE, KTHX.

And finally…  Dick-tater Chavez has “suspended”  his “charitable” contributions of heating oil to poor US households.  

GOOD.  Take your “charitable” contributions, Chavy, shove them up your ass, then follow immediately with a lit match.

And does the name of that Yet-Another-Fucking-Kennedy(what are they, rabbits??)’s “charitable” organization give anyone else the socialist-wiggins?  Citizen’s Energy Corporation: Don’t Worry, YOU Don’t Have to Work for It – Some Other Fool Does

Just a quick note – amidst the continued cooking (clementine fudge, sesame honey candy, tropical clusters, and a multitude of cookies) – to the people of Minnesota:

As if you, my faithful 64 readers, needed any further proof as to the great stinking cosmic joke that our political system has become…yet still I offer this as Exhibit 982,654:

SCARBOROUGH: You don’t know Obama. You can’t even tell me whether he ran the 2002 campaign of the most corrupt governor in America.

BARNICLE: I can tell you this much: he was a state senator then, and he ran that campaign about as much as I did.

SCARBOROUGH: Oh really? How do you know that?

BARNICLE: Just instinct.

SCARBOROUGH: Instinct?

BARNICLE: Yeah.

*fume*

You know, were these assclowns in any other industry they would never have made it past the unpaid summer intern stage.  Seriously, can you see answering Mister BigAss CEO with something that inane?

BIGASS CEO:  How does the 4th quarter look, Smithers?

SMITHERS:  Well, sir, my instincts say we’re going to finish strong!

BIGASS CEO:  ”Instincts”??  They teach you that shit at Harvard, boy?  I don’t want INSTINCTS, I want fuckin’ FACTS!  Now git your ass out of my sight!

Or maybe that’s just how it would work at Liberty Girl Enterprises.

Oh yes, I do, and this is the source.

Stop the “Lynching” of Rod Blagojevich: A Great Governor

The title right there pretty much says it all, no?  The author, one Peter N. Kirstein deploys his considerable, er, intellect in defense of the current frontrunner for Sleazebag of the Year.  You can go read the entire thing if you like (and then come back and explain to me how our nation “gratuitously spills their blood…in emergency rooms,” for fuck’s sake), or you can view his Wikipedia entry and learn everything you need to know.

Kirstein is a progressive known for his antiwar views, dynamic lectures and support of academic freedom.  He claims to be a pacifist.

He is a nationally known advocate of academic freedom and has defended free-speech rights of many scholars who were denied tenure, incarcerated or removed from their position for speech and controversial writings.

It’s simply astonishing, is it not, how often the words “pacifist” and “completely ignorant of history and/or the law” go together, no?  A private company firing someone – or otherwise refusing to grant immutable job security (a bullshit concept if ever there was one) – has (pay attention now) NOTHING WHATSOEVER TO DO WITH FREEDOM OF SPEECH.

Only the GOVERNMENT can infringe on freedom of speech, you cockbiters, not a private company.  Jeebus, you can’t even ACT smart.

And “incarcerated”??  Just where the fuck do you think you live, son?  

Sweartagad, it is my stated goal in life to ensure my children enter University with nothing but wariness for these parasites, these psychic leeches.  There will be no starry-eyed professor worship going on here, I tell you.

Via Pirate Ballerina

It’s about to be a very busy day here at Liberty House, but while I enjoy my morning cuppa joe, here’s one more reason to wonder why we tolerate the existing state of the public school system:

A white social studies teacher attempted to enliven a seventh-grade discussion of slavery by binding the hands and feet of two black girls, prompting outrage from one girl’s mother and the local chapter of the NAACP.

Now why is it you think this stupid fucking cow only bound the hands and feet of the black girls and not EVERYONE’S hands and feet?  Because she’s a sadistic bitch, yes.

If you wanted to deliver a truly effective lesson on slavery, then you tie everyone up…but you’d STILL be a sadistic bitch.  

Honestly, in what kind of echo chamber are these people being trained that she had not one thought, not even the tiniest inkling, that this might be A Bad Idea?  Sure, kids that age are basically higher-functioning animals with abysmal taste, but you just don’t do something like that.  

Speaking of bitches, their Queen here needs to take the fuckin’ hint and maybe actually sew her mouth shut.

 

Natalie Maines, the lead singer of the Dixie Chicks, is being sued for defamation for statements she made at a rally in 2007 about the murders of three young boys.

A complaint was filed November 25 by Terry Hobbs, the stepfather of one of three 8-year old boys murdered in 1993.

His complaint says Maines wrongfully made a “false and reckless claim that [Hobbs] committed the murders of the three boys.”

…

Damien Echols, Jessie Misskelley and Jason Baldwin were convicted of the murders in 1994.

 

Oops.  I guess you aren’t really all that misunderstood at all, are you.  

Here’s the video slideshow, with bonus not-used-to-speaking-in-public news conference voiceover, for the arrest of that sack of ass rampaging through Plant City yesterday.  I have to say, I’m very disappointed this didn’t end in the discharge of about 250 peace officer sidearms.